Not sure who needs to know this, but if you download and install the Windows version of Rufus, the free software for writing ISO images to USB/CD-ROM, your PC will end up with about 100 trojans.
Edit: Had a conversation with the maintainer(s) of Rufus, who told me the malware alerts were almost certainly from Windows Defender scanning the files in the Linux ISO I was trying to burn, and not from the program itself. I'm willing to accept that may be the case here, but I also no longer have a way to check b/c I nuked the system after all the alerts, and the bios produced a warning when the system restarted.